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We had our first house guest spending the night at our place: my best friend T was in town from Hawaii. You would have thought that I would have woke up early to greet my friend and get breakfast started. Nope, I was too ensnarled in my dreams and the bed sheets to get up and get it together.
Instead of waking up early to perhaps sneak in a little morning sex or make breakfast for my guest, I chose to sleep in.
E jumped up to start coffee, and once the aroma of the brewed beans wafted through the apartment, I perked up. I peeked in the refrigerator to see what I could make for breakfast.
I had sourdough English muffins in the fridge. When I pulled them out, E’s face contorted into that Van Gogh Edvard Munch “The Scream” painting. “And we don’t have orange juice,” he added, disappointed.
“I guess breakfast is just canceled now, isn’t it?” I sarcastically responded. He grabbed his keys, and headed to the corner bodega in search of better bread and OJ.
Meanwhile, I took another look at our refrigerator. That top shelf was full of cheeses. Cheddar, brie, goat, parmesan, pecorino, feta, ricotta… this was embarrassing. “Why do we have eight types of cheese in our refrigerator?” I yelled at E when he returned with bread, juice and a dozen eggs.
There must have been at least $100 worth of cheese in here and we probably only used $34.76 of it. Our monthly car insurance payment is less than the value of the cheese on that shelf.
“Dude, we’re cheese hoarders!” I said.
Additionally, we had two dozen eggs in the refrigerator because we already had a dozen eggs in the fridge, but E didn’t see them before he left for the store. “We hoard dairy products!” I scoffed. “We are funneling our household funds into dairy products! We could have filled the car up with gas for all this money in cheese here.”
“But we can make killer cheese plates with our stockpile,” E replied.
I was disgusted. We ended up with multiples of daily products because we didn’t keeping track of what we buy. Perhaps E should develop an app for that.
I wanted to clear out some of those eggs and cheese, so poached eggs, bacon and parmesan cheese breakfast sandwiches was the result (in the process, I learned the coolest thing–how to poach eggs without a poacher. Check it out here). We made a slight dent in our supply and fed our house guest appropriately. We also vowed not to visit the dairy aisle at the grocery store for a while.
2 eggs, poached
4 slices bacon
2 English muffins or slices of bread
1/4 cup parmesan cheese, grated
1 tbsp chives chopped
Cook bacon to desired crunchiness. Poach eggs (don’t have a poacher? Try this–heat water with a splash of vinegar on stove in saucepan, but do not boil. Before water hits boiling, swirl the water in one direction with a whisk. Then crack egg into a small dish, and pour raw egg into the center of swirling water. The swirl of the water will mold the egg around itself. Let cook in water for about 2 minutes or until desired firmness. Remove, and place into cold water to stop the cooking process). Toast English muffins. When done, layer parmesan cheese on one side of sandwich. Then layer on bacon. Carefully place the poached egg on top of the bacon. Then add chives and salt and pepper to taste. Top with other side of English muffin. Makes two sandwiches.
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