E is 100 sandwiches away from buying an engagement ring, according to his declaration today in the New York Post.

Apparently my effort to make him 300 sandwiches—and the international social media scrutiny that followed—have springboarded E into action. He’s starting to do his engagement research.

I should be thrilled right?

E wrote in his essay today that he’s been contemplating what his engagement performance should be. “A 300 dancer Bollywood proposal spectacular? 300 John Cusacks with boomboxes overhead? A 300-member flashmob gospel choir? A combination of the three?” I think the John Cusacks could be cute.

Additionally, sources tell me he’s getting guidance on the ring as well. I overheard him talking to friends of ours during Thanksgiving about “buying one of these” as he waved his left hand in his face. The day after, he asked me what type of ring I’d like for myself. “I just want to know for the future,” he said. “Do you want a square or round stone? What type of setting do you want?” I almost dropped my dinner when he asked.

Am I happy? Am I excited? Do I feel like our engagement is just a few peanut butter and jelly sandwiches away?

Actually, I feel disappointed.

After E’s hilarious, heartfelt essay, one thing is certain:

I absolutely, positively, for no fathomable reason whatsoever cannot EVER wear that red floral dress ever again.

photo credit: Rene Cervantes

Readers, how do you think E should propose? Leave your answers in the comments below, e-mail us at 300sandwiches@gmail.com, or tweet us at @300sandwiches or the newly launched @mr300sandwiches!

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